quiddity: (playful)
Well so. I'm trying it out again. My personal journal's not a very good place for anything really "deep." I don't want people think I've wandered into crazy town because I start spouting stuff. But I've said that before.

Why do I keep falling off the track? Why don't I... idk. Do something amazing with my time? Instead of dicking around? I know I don't have forever; five years (four and a half now) is the max. I've got to get my shit together, somehow or another.

I've been toying around with ideas and even writing fic again.

I have a huge outline detailed for a Labyrinth/Sailor Moon cross, one that would replace the original Pawns, Rooks, and Queens. It's detailed pretty much step-by-step from beginning to end, though of course, I have to be flexible. Anyway, I like the ideas, and I completed a draft for the prologue, and chapter one is in progress but I set it aside for a while after I felt like maybe I was going to burn myself out again, in favor of working on a second (what I thought was) shorter piece...

...(Which is) a Zelda/SM cross that was supposed to be a relatively short one shot and has spawned into something over 115 pages long. I would say that the writing has lost control, maybe some of it has, but there is advancement, and I feel like all of the scenes are necessary for the buildup, the emotional pay off. I have not gotten lost as to where the story is going; in fact, I already have the ending (well, a potential ending) written. I think there is are something like fifty pages left to be written at this point, maybe 70. I'm stalled at the moment on the fic, though. I've been analyzing some of the things I was writing, and I'm not sure if I'm entirely comfortable with the direction some things were going in. I'm giving it some time to lie fallow and reevaluate it. There's a chance that a good 5-15 pages may change dramatically.

I really wish that I had someone to talk to about the specifics of the problem/project as it is now, but I'm also uncertain as to whether or not I want to release the fic to anyone for reading at this point. I've had a few people agree to beta for me, but, what does beta really mean? In order to properly beta, don't I need the whole first draft to be ready first? And can I really expect anyone to read and critique that much material? I honestly don't know if they'd still be interested. Well. Anyway. Going to give it a little more time and then try tinkering again.

As far as original work goes... I have two long, novel-sized (but vague) ideas that are bouncing around in my head. One is kind of... very very loosely based around an idea that occurred to me in one of my college creative writing classes. The idea was what would happen if a part of your body was gone, and what that would mean, if you kept functioning without it. I chose the heart. I think it could make for a really fun YA kind of deal. If only I could get myself to sit out and write up an actual plot line, it could be something, someday. Maybe. Or perhaps it would be very trite and cheesy. I won't know until I've really tried to explore it. The second would be an idea based on something I wrote last night, and just generally explores urban fantasy stuff that I've wanted to work with for a long time, but it would also kind of feed off the mahou shoujo stuff that I've been stewing/steeping in for so so long. Think... Card Captor Sakura meets Kim Harrison's stuff with a protagonist plenty old enough to get involved in blood, guts (and lust). ...Yeah, that's the kind of book I want to write, I think.

As for short stories. I have two that I would really really like to do something with, if I could just ever figure out what that something is. Or three. Hell, four. *sigh* The roommate that turns into the boyfriend-eating mermaid, the teacher centaur, the transmogrified therapy group, and the demon living in the bachelor pad closet. I just have too many beginning ideas, and then no real idea where I want to take them, or what story it is these beginning thoughts want to tell. Although actually, I'm starting to wonder if the centaur one couldn't be some kind of allegory for the time I've spent in Japan as a JET/foreigner. Oddly, it could work.

Later, I'll try to post what I've been working on in some kind of mass dump.

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Lauren

April 2015

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